# 251 08/16/04

In the daily challenges of parenting, do you often feel discouraged? Once a problem is solved, a new one pops up. You can say, “This, too, shall pass,” but you must be prepared for the next challenge that will follow.

Understanding the patterns of child development helps. Children have tasks to accomplish as they mature. When they are approaching a new task, they are difficult to manage. When the task is mastered, there is a period of harmony and peace.

Most children have periods of turmoil around the ages of two, six, eleven and fourteen. Each of those approximate ages represents major developmental tasks.

A two-year-old is adjusting to the major tasks of communicating and asserting independence from Mom. Giving him opportunities to accomplish these tasks will decrease the number of temper tantrums.

Six-year-olds are expected to go to school, learn to read, make new friends, mind the teacher and leave the stuffed animal at home. A parent’s job is to acknowledge his concerns, encourage him and help him accomplish the tasks. The result will be fewer major “melt-downs.”

Eleven-year-olds have major changes going on in their bodies. They must learn to deal with those outward changes while riding a hormonal roller coaster. Understanding and patience on the part of parents go a long way toward easing the frustration of these times.

Finally, fourteen-year-olds face high school four-year plans, extracurricular choices, class choices, popularity pressures and a big school building. (Eighth graders always told me that getting lost was their biggest fear about going to high school.) Parents need to be available for time together. A teen cannot talk about his fears and concerns in quick sound bites.

When Joshua was about to enter the Promised Land, God said “Be strong and courageous because you will lead these people…” Joshua 1:6a. Parents should remember that Scripture. It does take strength and courage to parent godly children. But, the rewards are worth the work.